Slowing Down as a Single Parent

As a single parent, slowing down can feel really uncomfortable.

Because for so long, you haven’t had the luxury of slowing down. You’ve had to hold everything together. You’ve had to keep going, keep functioning, keep showing up for your kids, even when you’re exhausted and running on empty.

So, slowing down feels risky.

It can feel like if you stop, everything might catch up with you, like you have no time to stop because if you do it will all fall apart.

You keep moving. You stay productive. You fill every gap with something to do.

On the outside, you’re “handling it.” On the inside, you’re tired.

What often gets missed is that constantly pushing forward, constantly staying in go mode doesn’t actually create relief. It just keeps you distracted. It stops you from really checking in with how you’re feeling and what you actually need.

Slowing down isn’t about giving up. It’s about giving yourself space to breathe again.

For so many single parents, staying busy feels safer than slowing down. When you’ve already been through such a huge life shift, losing the relationship, losing certainty, losing control over how your life looks, the idea of stepping out of your comfort zone again can feel overwhelming.

You’ve already had your world turned upside down. You’ve already been forced out of your comfort zone in ways you didn’t choose.

So, it makes sense that your instinct is to stay where things feel familiar, even if they’re not really working. Even if they’re not lighting you up.

But staying busy and staying comfortable often keeps you stuck.

When you slow down, you start to notice what you’ve been missing. You notice how drained you feel. What no longer feels right. What you’ve been tolerating just to get through the day.

And yes, that can feel uncomfortable at first, especially if you’ve been in survival mode for a long time.

Slowing down doesn’t mean stopping your life. It means creating space to hear yourself again.

Sometimes that looks like putting the to-do list down for 10 or 15 minutes. Not planning. Not fixing. Not thinking about what needs to be done next. Just stopping.

It might be a short meditation. A walk without your phone. Sitting quietly with a coffee. Letting your mind settle instead of constantly pushing it forward.

Downtime has a ripple effect that goes far beyond the moment you take it. Giving yourself permission to pause, to stop, breathe, and just be, isn’t only good for you mentally and emotionally in that exact moment, it changes how you feel long after. Whether it’s sitting in quiet, listening to a podcast or music, meditating, moving your body gently, going for a calm workout, or doing some yoga, no one ever looks back after having down time and says, I regret taking that time for myself. 

In fact, it's the opposite that happens. You feel calmer, more relaxed. More grounded. Your mood shifts, your thoughts settle, and the constant mental noise finally turns down. When you step out of the nonstop doing, the ticking off to-do lists, you create space to process, reflect, and gain a fresh perspective.

That’s where the real magic is. It’s not just about what that quiet time gives you in the moment, it’s about how it carries forward, easing stress, tension, and anxiety, and leaving you feeling calmer, clearer, and more capable afterwards. When you stop forcing yourself to constantly do, you actually allow fresh ideas to come in and create space for calmness.

Slowing down isn’t a step backwards. For many single parents, it’s the first step towards getting back to themselves.

And when you allow that space, that’s when new things start to come in, the thoughts, plans, goals, ideas, a cleaner direction of what you want. Not because you forced it, but because you finally made space for new things to come in. You don't have to fill every void, every free time slot, every empty space with something just because you feel like you have to keep going. Every now and then enjoy that time to just be.

Let go of the mental clutter, because it's often not the actual to do list that's causing the constant distraction and business, it's the mental noise that you're running from and when you stop, that's when it all comes back up again.

But that's the most important part of it all. Giving yourself time to stop to allow the mental noise to quieten. It's time to enjoy those quiet moments, instead of feeling like you have to fill them up them tasks that drain you and leave you feeling exhausted

Please reach out if this is something you're struggling with and let's work though it together. You don't have to keep filling every second of your day. Allow time to reset to give yourself that fresh new perspective. Make this is your time to free yourself from the mental exhaustion that is sucking the life out of you.

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